Aww thank you, whoever you are! :)
Wow! Thank you so much! :)
Wow! Thanks for the AWESOME question Danny!! Well, to answer your first question, I’m not sure to be honest! I guess I was just born that way! Ever since I can remember I’ve always just been really awesome! I distinctly remember being just a tiny baby, and everyone would tell me, “Wow, Zac you are SO awesome!”. I guess it just comes naturally to me. But don’t get me wrong Danny you’re awesome too! I always see your great posts, and I think to myself, “GOD, Danny Dingle is fucking AWESOME! I know I’m pretty awesome already, but damn I wish I was as cool as Danny!”. But alas, I can only be as cool as I already am! ANYWHO, to answer your second question , we can go roller skating anytime! I’m always down for a sexy skate down the block! And I can only imagine how sexy your ass / bussy looks rolling down the avenue in your cute little shorty shorts and thigh high sequined skates! The only thing I’m honestly worried about is what our moms will think… I mean my mom is pretty cool and everything, but when I mentioned that I was going to go roller skating with you she said to me “NU UH! YOU AIN’T GOIN ROLLER SKATING WITH THAT DANNY DINGLE KID. Y’ALL ARE GONNA LOOK STUPID AS HELL WITH YOUR SHORT SHORTS FLOSSING YOUR ASS CRACKS!!” ARE YOU KIDDING ME MOM???!?!? UGH! I honestly can’t believe she would say something like that to me! UM IT’S CALLED SELF EXPRESSION MOM, HAVE YOU EVER HEARD OF IT?? And I know that you’ve had issues with your mom too Danny… I’m honestly really excited to go skating with you, but I’m just so scared of what people are gonna think…. YOU KNOW WHAT?? FUCK IT!!! I DON’T CARE ANYMORE!! I JUST WANNA GO SKATING WITH MY PAL DANNY! So that’s what I’m gonna do! Do let’s go buy our skates, pop a molly, and ride into our dreams! It’s honestly one of my favorite things to do! I remember the last time I did that I was going on a joy ride after my mom made me so angry, because she threatened to take away my swamp… WHAT THE FUCK MOM, YOU CAN’T JUST TAKE AWAY WHAT IS MINE!! Anywho I ended up on a magical quest with a lame donkey that wouldn’t stop talking about waffles… It was a hoot! We ended up picking up some red headed she beast, and I then I had to tell them my deepest darkest secret about my layers… I MEAN C’MON PEOPLE I CAN’T JUST TELL THAT TO ANYONE!! ESPECIALLY SOME LAME DONKEY AND SOME GREEN BULL DYKE!!! But then the lady confessed her love to me, and I had to pretend to like her back because I was embarrassed for her, even though I was secretly falling for the donkey… Then the next thing I know is that I’m waking up in a ditch with the Shrek soundtrack playing on my hit clips, and my mom screaming about how I’m never going to amount to anything if I won’t stop popping mollys and smoking meth at the same time while listening to show tunes…. YOU DON’T KNOW ME MOM!!! YOU DON’T KNOW THE REAL ME!! THIS IS MY LIFE, AND THIS IS HOW I CHOOSE TO LIVE IT!!! Oh well… It was at least sexier than the time I had my Bee Movie / Seinfeld crossover nightmare / wet dream. But that’s a story for another time! So yeah! Let’s go skating this weekend! That would give me the perfect amount of time to make my Toby Keith mix tape!! You know I can’t work up a good sweat without a little Red Solo Cup! It gives me just enough energy to get my ass cheeks moving! I guess you could say… IT FILLS ME UP! LOL! But really though, this weekend would work for me! Maybe we can make ourselves look real good (as if that’s gonna be hard…) so we can pick up some chicks!! Been a while since I’ve got some real chick ass!! Last time I even got close, I got so nervous that I shot a diarrhea rocket right up my back, and into my hair!! It was harder to get out of my hair then the time I got five pieces of hubba bubba in my bangs!!! Needless to say, she didn’t want a piece of my sweet body anymore… But if we pick up some hot chicks this weekend I’ll be sure to get real constipated on my mom’s swiss and hummus trout skins so I don’t make that mistake again!!! Oh! Also, do you think we could skate by my cousin Bigg Becky’s house?? She just moved to town from London, and I have to drop off some pads / vagisil before it becomes an issue, and she has to see a gynecologist / Uncle Bill. You might think she’s hot! I could maybe hook you two up! I’ve heard that she’s really good with Hot Carl / reverse squirty bidet play!! And she also won the world record for pube girth, so… if you’re into that then she’s the girl for you!! Also, we should try to skate by the Cedar Stump for ladies night!! I’ve heard that if we skate by wearing crop tops, that the ladies will flash us their boobs!! Which is good because there’s a new girl in town named Rita Johnson, that I think is just so cute! I’d love to see those knockers, if you know what I mean! LAWLZ! It’s been a while since I’ve seen a nice set… and Rita looks like she’s packin heat! Two milky pillows that I’d like to take a nap on!… Oh man, sorry Danny, I don’t mean to be such a sick pig… I’ve just got such a huge crush on this girl that I don’t know how to act when I think about her!!! She makes my palms all sweaty and my armpits swell up real bad… BUT YOU KNOW WHAT?? NEXT TIME I SEE HER I’M JUST GONNA TELL HER HOW I FEEL!! WHAT DO I HAVE TO LOSE?? I DON’T CARE IF MY MOM TELLS ME THAT I’LL NEVER BE ABLE TO SCORE CHICKS WITH MY ENLARGED ARMPITS AND ENGORGED BELLY BUTTON!!! I THINK THAT I’M BEAUTIFUL JUST THE WAY I AM!!! Anyways! I don’t mean to ramble! I’ll let you get back to your day Danny! I hope that Jimmy doesn’t give you too much HECK today! I know he likes to bother you by walking around the house in his thong and smashing all of your Shania Twain records! So next time he does something like that, tell him that big muscley Zac is gonna come over and duke it out with him!!! Ok, well let’s meet up tomorrow to buy our retro sequined roller skating boots at Ross Dress for Less!! I can’t wait to give the manager there swoons with our big sexy beefy legs sliding into our new fresh shoes!! Ok! PEACE DANNY!!! I’LL CATCH YOU ON THE FLIP SIDE BIG BOY!!
[opens pizza box] *snoop dogg voice* greetings loved ones